I'm glad you are my family

I was listening to The Khrusty Brothers (a side project of Don Chaffer of Waterdeep) a record written as a catharsis for the emotional turmoil that followed his parents passing, and I thought of my family. Most notably I thought of something my dad used to tell me and my brothers when we would fight. He would say "You need to treat each other with respect and love, because when we are gone all you will have will be each other." I think maybe my dad said this in reflection of his rough childhood, how he and his siblings were often at odds with each other, and maybe his parents didn't do a lot to stop it. Maybe he feels their longterm relationships have suffered, all of them battling with the alcoholism that my grandfather taught them, none of them staying terribly close to the others. At times I stop and think of how he got out of that dysfunctional family, that kind of family that maybe didn't teach you how to be a family and made this family that has taught me how to be a family. It's rather marvelous!

At the time it sounded weird to me, as a kid you never think your parents will die, cause then who would make supper, but it was haunting, it was like, you mean when you're gone my older and younger brother are just gonna gang up and tease me for the rest of my life. Years, later after the passing of my grandmother and one of my uncles, mortality seems a bit more real. A third of my life has probably passed, and my birthdays are starting to sting a little. I'm 25 next saturday and I may only have another twenty five years or so with my parents, which would make our time on earth together near half over. That's scary. I'm not trying to focus on the negative, but it is true that relationships with our siblings need to be strong so that we can whether the passing of our parents together whenever the time comes we can support, love, correct and cherish one another after that. I think of my brothers and sister and how it's easy to stay disconnected and distant sometimes. It's less sticky, the drama and responsibility that comes with people who know you better than anyone on earth isn't always easy. So let's plunge back into family, when it's very uncool, but very needed. I'll write it in digital stone, Brett, Rose, and Zachary I love you and I always will. Also in digital stone, Mom and Dad, Brenda and Bill, I'm glad it was you.